March 26, 2007

What is Steenky Bee?/Frequently Asked Questions

What is wrong with you?
My husband, Jeremy, asks me this almost daily. I am Jennifer. But people call me Jen…well, to my face anyway. Behind my back, I’m sure they call me much more colorful things. I am a wife, and a mother to two beautiful and loud children, Henry and Reese. I'm honored to live my life with them. We reside in Northern-ish Utah. (No, polygamy is not legal. Anymore.) Utah is awesome. Don't let anyone tell you any different. We have two cats (one of which is kick-ass) and two dogs (both are kick-ass.) We used to have a fish but the cat who isn't so kick-ass ate him.

Why 'Steenky Bee'?
It's simple, really. You see, 'Steenky Bee' is the name we gave our son's binkie (pacifier) habit that he unfortunately held on to for waaaaay too long. Don't ask how long. We're quite embarrassed about it. We ditched the last of the binkies when we bribed our son to trade them in for a 12" Batman action figure. (Coincidentally, our daughter has now assumed ownership of said Batman figure by exercising squatter rights. And let me tell you, her Barbies have never been so happy, if you know what I mean.)

BTW: I tried to name this blog "Stinky Bee" but it was already taken by an angsty teen who was raging against the man (and her parents for forcing her to do homework at regular intervals).

Why do you seem to suddenly disappear from the internet at random?
Well, sometimes I have other things I like to do, like go to work where I make actual money, or spend time with my husband and children who help me spend said money. Other times I just want to drink a bunch of A&W Cream Soda, fight with my husband for the remote control and watch VH1 Countdown specials (When I win - which is never.)

I’ve seen several typos in your posts. What’s the deal?
Well, aren't we awfully judgmental? So I forget to use spelcheck. All the time. It happens.

What else should we know about you?
I also mishandle parenthesis, quotation marks and hyphens. It's something I "struggle" with on a day-to-day (basis).

That's not exactly what I was after. I mean, are there any other interesting tidbits you want to tell us?
Sure! Let me start off by telling you my likes and dislikes: I like stretchy pants. I hate the word "tidbits". I love Utah. I hate being hot. I am comfortably into my thirties. I spill food down the front of my shirt. Always. I smile at strangers, but don't let my children talk to them. I will always hold the door open for you. No one ever tells Jeremy he got a catch when he found me, but they always tell me that about him. I am incapable of road rage. I am disgusted by public swimming pools. I can twirl a baton. I rarely believe anything I'm told.

If you’re not totally put off by me now, feel free to email me at {jenboglass [at] yahoo [dot] com}