Best attempted slam in a song ever
"Laura" by The Scissor Sisters
This song must be the motto for every beauty school student out there. I can never get enough of the final few lines of the song when what may be the cruelest comeback in stylist history is uttered: “This will be the last time I ever do your hair.” Let this tune be a lesson for us all. Never tick off your hair dresser.
Best song for versatile use in almost any movie montage
"You Make My Dreams Come True" by Hall & Oats
I mean, come on, who doesn’t think this song totally rawks in an ironic sort of way? The duo of Hall & Oates practically owned the music charts in the 80s. But if you count Oats’ mustache as a third band member, which I do, they’re actually considered a trio. These men, and all their hair, mullet, ‘stache and otherwise, still hold a soft spot in my heart.
Best song that serves as a reminder that you can never have enough fiber in your diet
"Slave To Love" by Bryan Ferry
If you’ve never seen 9 ½ Weeks starring Kim Bassinger and a young Mickey Rourke (yummers, see below), then this reference is lost on you. But then again, so would the beauty of a fully stocked fridge of fresh foods. Rent it. Watch it. Mourn loss of Mickey's before-face.
"Short Skirt, Long Jacket" by Cake
Best song that was on the very first album I bought with my own allowance money
"Too Much Time on My Hands" by Styx
I love Styx, seriously I do. But not all that Dennis DeYoung crap like "Lady" or "Mr. Roboto". Those monstrosities just go on and on forever. No, "Too Much Time On My Hands", sung by Tommy Shaw, not only has the funkiest start up of a rock song, but it also has thee best clap-along chorus ever written. “Is it any wonder I’ve got too-ooh much
"Mr. Roboto" by Styx
"I Just Want to be Your Everything" by Andy Gibb