June 17, 2009

I'm Blogging About a Lunch I Was Invited to Because I Have a Blog

So remember a few months back when I had my first face-to-face meet up with a blogger? Remember how I kicked my shoe off in her face and made her look at a dead cockroach? Well, this past weekend I had my second blogger meet up and I have to say, it went about the same.

The lovely Kristina from Pulsipher Predilections (she’s a big deal, yo) hosted her third lunch for local Utah bloggers to meet, eat and cackle out loud about how hairy David Hasselhoff is. Okay, that last bit about cackling about the Hoff’s hairiness might have only been me.

Anyway, like any other blogger out there who is getting ready for a meet up with another blogger, I was super nervous. Would they like me? Would I make an ass out of myself? Would my hair sit right? I was hoping all signs would point to YES.

I believe there were close to 30 lovely blogging ladies lunching Saturday and everyone was wonderful and so much fun to talk to. When I reached the banquet room at the top of the stairs, I made an immediate bee-line for one of my favorite people, Green Jello from May You Lead An Interesting Life. She claims she saw me first because my poofy hair preceded me by about four seconds. Four seconds, Green Jello? Really? All the rain must have matted my hair down a little. Typically, with weather permitting, my mane has a six second lead on me everywhere I go.

Here’s a picture of Green Jello and me with wide smiles and full bellies.

Here’s Green Jello with admitted lurker and stalker of Green Jello, Val of the South. She blogs over at Livin' la Vida Utah!. She’s awesome. She made me laugh. Then I challenged her to a drag race on I-15. Wisely, Val declined. She claimed she had errands to run. I claim she was chicken.


Here’s Kristina shouting at me that she’ll cut me if I post this picture of her online. Oh Kristina, you are so funny. When you weren't looking I rummaged through your purse and aside from a pair of tweezers and a Kenny Loggins Greatest Hits CD, you're totally harmless.


Here’s a blurry picture of Green Jello, me and the hilarious S of Lady of Perpetual Chaos. (I swiped this image from Kristina's site.)

I’m so glad I was seated near S as I’m pretty sure she could be a stand up comedian if she wanted to. You know how people tell you stories about their children and sometimes you’re all um, yeah….uh huh….okay, are you done now? Well not with S. She had the wittiest way about her and I left wanting to hear more of her tales but I was fearful she would get nervous, call the authorities and have a protective order issued against me if I kept up with all the questions. And folks, I just can’t have another one of those blemishes on my record.

Here’s all the ladies that attended the lunch on Saturday. Kristina and Green Jello both claimed to be giants and quite tall, but, um hello! look where the line peaks at its tallest. It begins and ends with my hair. And if you were paying attention from earlier in this post, you would recall that my hair was matted down from the rain.

One of the more unlikely highlights of the lunch was when two women approached me when they heard that I was a friend of a “famous blogger”. They were giddy like schoolgirls as they probed me with questions about their cyber crush, Captain Dumbass over at Us and Them.

Girls: Are you really friends with him?
Me: If the money’s right.
Girls: Is he really that funny in real life?
Me: No. Not even close.
Girls: (blank and horrified stares)
Me: You know? I don’t even think those are his kids in the photos that he posts. And the bald guy? I hear he’s just one of those stock photography models. No one really knows who the Captain is or what he looks like.

I spent the rest of the lunch dropping his name randomly into conversations in the hopes that my one-degree of separation from greatness would earn me a free pasta lunch, but all the Captain’s name brought me was a second refill on my lemonade.

As a side note: I contacted the Captain yesterday (can you hear the squeals all the way from Utah?) to tell him just how far reaching his fame had become. During the conversation I inadvertently offended him by referring to him as a slightly older, okay really older, version of a Jonas brother, but with way less hair.

The Captain seriously has no idea how big the Jonai or his bald head are in our fair state.

46 comments:

Cameron said...

Huh?

IB said...

So, you're saying the Captain is FAMOUS?

huh. I guess you gotta be a girl to get it. Same goes for the Jonas brothers.

Funny post. Great hair.

Dana's Brain said...

I gotta admit I never knew there were so many Utah bloggers! That's cool.

Also? I love that your hair is the peak of that picture.

Ali said...

This makes me want to move to Utah! Looks like a great bunch of bloggers!

Cameron said...

Wow...first!! I recently had a meet-up with a local blogger, but my hair got there roughly at the same time that I did.

Ms. Salti said...

Ok, now I'm thoroughly bummed that I didn't go. What the hell is wrong with me?!

I'm glad you girls had fun, and I will definitely be attending the next one!

And you've got waaaay better curls than I do, girl!

Sprite's Keeper said...

The plural of Jonas is Jonai?
Nice. I just thought Jonasty would cover the trio.
Forget the Captain! (Hi, Captain!) You got to see Green Jello again? Jealous!

Jenni said...

i'm so jealous. i never get to meet fellow blogers.

Captain Dumbass said...

I'm loading up the man-van and heading for Utah. Do I have to bring my own coffee?

Sell...Party Of 3 said...

I wish that we could have played musical chairs so that I could have talked to you more! You are hillar.

PAPATV said...

Shotgun!! on the Man Van. Looks like there's a lot of lovely ladies running wild in Utah!

Jess said...

LMAO! I love it! I wish there were less drinkers and more bloggers in Savannah! We would totally have a get together. Wait. I mean I wish there were more drinking bloggers in Savannah! Yes, that is what we need!

I was wondering what the loom was over our fair city was...it was the Capt's big head!!!

DeeMarie said...

That's it. Make room. I'm moving to Utah.
Love the scarf!!! :)
Seriously, the Captain is famous? Who knew!?!?

Miss Grace said...

Captain Dumbass, will you pick me up on your way?

DG at Diary of a Mad Bathroom said...

Why do all bloggers live in Utah? I didn't know that Utah had that many people, no less such a large blogging community.

Population of Utah - 2,736,424
Number of bloggers U know - at least 30

Population of New York - 19,490,297
Number of bloggers I know - 0 (I don't count myself because I don't blog as much as I just complain online)

Pamela said...

There's always a fun grammar lesson to be learned at The Sneaky Bee.

Mama Dawg said...

Dude, we're friends with someone famous? I never knew. We totally need to amp up the bloggie war for his affections.

He sent me a mug you know. Filled with delicious candy.

Kristina P. said...

Clearly, I need to be reading Captain Dumbass. How did I miss out.

And I will cut you. And send Mario Lopez over here. He will give you swine flu.

Pseudonymous High School Teacher said...

I've learned a lot about Utah this morning. Another blog posted the gay pride festival in Utah. Now I find out that there are enough bloggers to have a mini coference and that in Utah the Captain is a celeb.

Apparently I need to get my Utah info from other places the the show Big Love.

Zip n Tizzy said...

That drag race would have been so perfect on youtube.
Oh well. Next time.

Lady of Perpetual Chaos said...

You are SO hilarious! I will never be as funny as you! And I like your hair. I'll never call the cops or get a protective order against you, although I do get violent if phone calls interrupt sleep around here. At the very worst, I'd just make you watch slides of our family reunions and force feed you granola and mountain dew. ;o)

Captain Dumbass said...

I just remembered that Indiana Jones was from Utah. If you had an ocean around you like Hawaii you'd totally be my favourite state.

anymommy said...

Gah, Utah bloggers are cool. We never have fun stuff like this on the edge of Idaho. Maybe I'm the only person with a computer, ah, I mean blogger, in this here vicinity.

Jenni Jiggety said...

Why can't I ever get to go to stuff like that???

How freaking FUN! Kristina and YOU in the same place would be all kinds of blog fabulousness!

Tricia said...

I had no idea Utah was breeding bloggers in droves...I thought you were the only one!!!

Sam said...

I used to think all of the bloggers lived in either California or Florida, but I guess I was wrong. Utah is where it's at.

Irish Gumbo said...

Well...the Captain should keep in mind that the "only thing worse than being talked about is NOT being talked about"!

But, really, the Jonas bros.? Eeep.

A Lawyer Mom's Musings said...

Kristina P got to meet you? You're way more famous that Captain DA. Oh, I am so jealous!

And she had a tape of Kenny Loggins in her purse? Now I am really jealous. I LOVE Kenny Loggins. Except, mm, "Christopher Robin" is swirling around in my head now and it won't go away.

Casey said...

So you're saying that I've had a famous blogger comment on my blog? I can't believe it. You guys could totally pass as sister wives in that picture.

Middle Aged Woman Blogging said...

Bloggers Unite!! Isn't Dooce from Utah? I figured Utha was the blogging capital of the world, what the heck do I know? Funny post, great pics!

Melanie D said...

my brothers famous?? maybe I should start selling personal items of his on my blog and I could get some more followers....or money...or scary stalkers....hmmm maybe I'll have to rethink that one!

Chris Wood said...

So blogging gets you a free lunch in Utah? Not bad. Not bad at all!

supreme leader said...

The Captain is a celebrity?! Whatevs! He's still not getting that personal assistant he's asking for.

Bex said...

after reading green jello's post, i was hoping to see some pics of your fabulous hair!

Krystal said...

Dude - I can only imagine how this went and all I need to say is that I had to laugh so hard I almost peed my pants and yeah - the captain is all kindsof famous but in my little world at least - I don't know much about the outside world - don't talk much to people out there. They are kinda scary!!

sanewithoutdrugs said...

How wonderful meeting your blogging friends!! I know of just a couple other bloggers in Columbus, OH. I don't think that I want to meet them. I like being hidden.

FoN said...

Wow - and I've heard it's even kind of hard to get liquor in Utah. Sober chicks dig the Captain!

Blogging Mama Andrea said...

Wow, I mean I knew he was famous and all but wow. Maybe we should pass him around? I mean Supreme Leader would probably share if we got her a nanny right?

It sounds like a great time and I HEART Green Jello. Who wouldn't?

I'm thinking after I swing by Atlanta and see Kat I ought to come hang out in Utah. That seems to be where the fun is.

honeypiehorse said...

You didn't wear your bee hat! 'May you have an interesting life' is actually a Chinese curse.

Lisa (Jonny's Mommy) said...

Captain Dumbass? I mean, what can you say about a man who chose the nickname that every man in the.entire.world should have.

Sheesh.

Stacy (the Random Cool Chick) said...

That does it! I'm definitely going to have to move to a more blogger-friendly location so I can hang out with some cool peeps. Where does Captain Dumbass and supreme leader live? Maybe that's the place to go...or Utah. ;)

Looks like everyone had so much fun!!

Amo said...

Holy hell...

First, THERE ARE OTHERS OUT THERE?! I am certainly the only blogger near Raleigh and I'm pretty sure the ONLY one who gets my humor.

Second, the hair. Woman, that mane is awesome! You could hide a third world country in there. Or maybe a kitten.

Please tell me you are going to blogher so I can pet it. Wait, that sounded kinda freaky and maybe a touch stalkerish...

Stiletto will vouch for me! I'm a good egg...

shopgirl said...

Oh Stinky Bee... why oh why do I stay away so long - you are friggin' HA-LARRY-US!!! Love the hair love the scarf!!

Jealous that I wasn't part of this awesome luncheon...may have to move to Utah...

GreenJello said...

I'm so totally behind on blog reading because I was getting Dizzy... just barely reading your writeup.

Sounds about right. Except that you forgot to mention that you were wearing heels, which topped you out in the height department.

Cheater.

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